Episode 31: The Ritual Part 4
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Ritual Site C: A Taste of Sudden Danger! The Grand Finale!
Physical Description: A humble snare lying on the floor.
Kanae's Description: This is it. Our lovely pair has persevered against all other struggles, but just when they thought all was safe, unpredictable danger struck! Will this excursion turn into tragedy, or will the pair live to see tomorrow?! One thing is certain--they will never leave each other again!
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Elma looked on, flabbergasted. "What?"
"It's the final ritual site," Kanae replied as she put her notepad away for the last time.
"Hey, 'unpredictable danger?' What happened to never exposing children to anything more than the risk of a fall?"
"But Fainn and Dorthaunzee are not children."
"Oh yeah, you sure about that? It feels like they're children when it suits you, though."
Kanae sighed. "Elma, please, you must understand that this is for Dorthaunzee's sake."
"How?" Elma replied, straight-faced.
Kanae lit up, happy to share. "Well, you see. I personally oversaw two occasions where the children were ambushed by a predator no one knew was in the area. I, of course, stepped in and protected them. As I said, I would never willingly subject children to such things. What's interesting is what happened after."
"And what was that?"
"Those two pairs went on to be the most prolific pairs I had ever seen."
"Oh, dear god."
"Exactly. Astounding--there is no word that could better describe it. One of those pairs even solved a village's population problems all by themselves."
Elma was aghast. "They solved a village's population problems all by themselves? Hey, wait, does Drollfall not take precautions against inbreeding?" She looked at Svilran, the person she hoped would be a beacon of cold, rational sense. "Am I misunderstanding something? That became a problem for later generations, right?"
"I'm not the best person to ask. Deities have strange and unique ways of producing offspring."
Elma turned back toward Kanae. "Hey, isn't that concerning? Is that village okay generations later--"
"You concern yourself with trivial details. All that matters is the continuation of life--"
"Ho, no, no, quality of life matters too--"
"Yes, and numbers will make more of a positive impact on a dead world. So much more such that it outweighs the negatives of stubborn generational illnesses."
"Madam Goddess!" Elma said, looking for Svilran to step in and add perspective.
"Now, now, Elma. Everything's okay, and Kanae's efforts have worked thus far, right? We don't need to scrutinize everything."
Kanae smiled. "Thank you, Svilran."
"I mean, I'm not trying to scrutinize--I just want to make sure we're on the same page..."
"By the way, you did set up the snare the way I instructed, yes?" Kanae asked, ignorant of Elma's concerns.
Elma nodded. "Yeah, I did. Thanks for teaching me that trap."
"Fufu, then all is well. We cannot replicate the unpredictable danger since we lack monsters--"
"That makes it sound like you were willing to set a monster on them," Elma remarked.
"--so a simple trap will do. Dorthaunzee will walk into it, she'll be captured, and then Fainn will save her, and they will solve the Hub's population problems."
"We don't have population problems. Also, I didn't know the plan was for Zee to get caught--"
"Yes, this is certainly the best fertility booster among the steps."
"I don't think fertility works like that."
Kanae was much too in her head to hear Elma's remarks. Instead, she observed as Fainn and Dorthaunzee approached the ritual site.
"Dorthaunzee knows what to look for. She just needs to stand on the snare and trigger the trap..."
Elma, despite her protests, was very invested in this step, if only to see if she had set the trap correctly.
Svilran, meanwhile, was just overjoyed to be doing something so fun that was also so helpful. Elma and Kanae got to bond, and Dorthaunzee got to be happy--there was nothing that could make Svilran happier.
"There she goes... and it's taken her into the air! Good job, Elma!"
"Dorth?!" Fainn yelped as he watched Dorthaunzee dangle above his head. "Why is the Jungle attacking us?!"
Meanwhile, behind the bushes of conspiracy--
Kanae tensed up. "Oh... uhoh."
Elma's jaw fell open. "Hey! What the?!"
Svilran just hid her face behind her hands in shame.
Dorthaunzee, her foot caught by the snare and suspended in the air, was coming face to face with the unfortunate reality of what happens when one wearing a loose dress is dangled upside down.
The poor nun, frantically trying to preserve her modesty, was desperately holding her skirt against her legs. Her choice of underwear did not make the situation any easier.
Elma recoiled in horror as those gray, full cheeks were reflected in her eyes.
"What!? Why?! Why isn't she wearing safety shorts!?" Elma asked, noting the extremely skimpy pair of underwear barely covering anything.
"I'm sorry," Svilran cried from behind her hands. "I got distracted by all the cute outfits Dorthaunzee's closet came with! I'm a terrible dresser!"
"Oh, screw this," Elma said as she pulled out a dagger.
She knew Dorthaunzee was panicked. The poor nun was so focused on covering up her front that she forgot that her backside was exposed.
"I'll save you, Zee--"
"No!" Kanae said as she grabbed both of Elma's hands.
"Hey, what are you doing, Kanae?!"
"We're too close! We can't ruin this!"
"Are you mad?! Zee's dangling there!"
"No!"
"Let go, Kanae! I'm not going to let my friend give up her modesty when she doesn't want to--"
"Oh no!" Svilran gasped.
Both Kanae and Elma stopped their fighting to look at Dorthaunzee.
"Hey!" Elma yelped. "Her bre--are her breast falling out?! Isn't she wearing a bra?"
Kanae, too, was perplexed. "Hold on... Dorthaunzee has such massive mammaries, but she doesn't wear a chestband? Does she not have back pain?"
Both women looked at Svilran, who buried her head further into the bushes in front of her.
"I don't need to wear bras, so I didn't think about it!"
Both women, dumbfounded, stared at Svilran's assets as they jiggled with divine power.
"Dorth! Hold on!"
Fainn's yell snapped Kanae and Elma back to their senses, and they resumed their struggle.
"I'm saving her right now!"
"No, not yet!"
"I'm not letting her suffer any longer--"
"Now!"
"Huh?"
"Now, Elma! Now!"
Elma, her hands released, fired one hand at the cordage, suspending Dorthaunzee. The dagger in that hand cut through the cordage--
"Yes!" Kanae cheered.
--and Dorthaunzee fell.
Fainn panicked. "Oh shit--"
Dorthaunzee fell right on Fainn as Kanae pumped her fists. "Perfect Shot-oh!" she said, posing with the 'V-for-victory' sign next to her eye.
Elma just stared at the mad woman.
Kanae, passions ignited, shook with excitement.
"Now's the time, Dorthaunzee! Kiss him!"
Svilran lifted her head from the bushes and pursed her lips. "Kiss?"
Elma's eyes went wide. "Him?"
They both looked at Kanae.
""Dorthaunzee doesn't have a mouth.""
Kanae looked at them. Her eyes went wide as cracks spread across her face, and thin slivers of pink skin poked out.
"Dorthaunzee... Doesn't have a mouth..." Kanae repeated. "I forgot," she said, dumbfounded.
All three stared at the scene again. Dorthaunzee was on top of Fainn, with her forehead against his chest, and her trembling hands holding onto his shirt.
"Hey, Dorth, are you okay?" Fainn groaned.
{"I love you..."}
Fainn looked down at her. "D-Dorth?"
Dorthaunzee tightened her grip on his shirt as she pressed her head further into his chest.
{Please hear my feelings. Please... I love you, My Savior."
Tears fell out from her eyes and soaked his shirt.
{"Please. Please hear me."}
Fainn's eyes widened. "Hey--wait, Dorth. I don't think I heard that right--"
{"Please!"}
Dorthaunzee lifted her head and looked into his eyes, tears streaming from her eyes.
{"Please hear my feelings, My Savior! I don't care if you rebuke me afterward--I just want you to hear me. Please, I just want to tell you that I've loved you from the moment you saved me from my curse."}
"Dorthaunzee," Fainn said, still shocked.
{"I've loved you since the moment you took away my fears. Since the moment you let me live a life where I didn't have to be afraid of what was within me bursting out. Since the moment you let me think without the shackles of fear around my thoughts."}
Fainn hugged her tighter.
{"I love you. The person who let me be happy without restraint--My Savior!"}
Fainn's head fell backward, surprising Dorthaunzee.
{"My Savior?"}
She heard what sounded like a chuckle escape his lips. She squirmed up his body until her head was over his. Then, when she saw his face, she reacted with wide-eyed surprise.
"Oh, sorry, Dorth," Fainn said.
The young man had tears rolling down his face, almost matching Dorthaunzee's own. The gentle nun carefully wiped away one tear as the man showed her a clumsy smile.
{"What is wrong, My Savior?"}
"Sorry, Dorth, I was just taken by surprise." Fainn pressed his trembling lips together as he built up the courage to ask, "Did I hear that right? You like me? Like a lot? In that way?"
Dorthaunzee nodded so quickly she could have hurt her neck.
Fainn giggled. "Wow... Really wow... I didn't..." His smile grew wider. "A devout woman like you actually likes me?"
Dorthaunzee nodded again.
"I just... I just never thought that someone like that. Someone who was devout and actually good would ever like me like that." His eyes widened. "Wait, is that okay? I don't know how strict your god is, but you do follow a god, right, Dorth?"
She nodded.
"And this is okay?"
{"Only if it's okay with you..."} she said with both her thoughts and her hands.
"I--yeah! It's fine with me! If you would have me--then it's fine with me!"
Dorthaunzee smiled with her eyes as tears flowed from her eyes and happiness radiated from her heart.
{"My Savior! Thank you!"} she cried as she wrapped her arms around him and pressed her head against his.
Fainn, chuckling like a goofy boy, hugged her back. "I'll just have to explain to Svilran and Elma, but I'm sure they'll be fine with it."
Over in the bushes of success--
"Heh, I don't have a problem with it so long as the love delivered is fair," Elma said.
"I just need to tell myself that we're that type of household," Svilran followed. "Well, as long as everyone is happy."
Kanae didn't say anything, as the results spoke for themselves. Instead, she turned around and started crawling away.
Elma noticed and followed. "Yeah, our work here is done. Let's go, goddess."
"Aww, and I wanted to keep watching..." Svilran giggled to herself. "I love happy people!" she sang as she followed Elma.