Ch 56. Impractical Jokers
“Oh…?”
“I didn't expect anyone to come at this time of the day.”
“This time? Ja! Cool one there!”
Wait, this scene feels extremely familiar, like something taken out right from pop-culture. Sitting around a table, with plates that only had crumbs left, empty cups with dried tea on the bottom and a beautiful teapot that surely was empty too, were these three mysterious… Monsters?
The three of them had tired eyes and an obviously fake smile drawn on their faces. The first one was a human, or at least he looked like one, but his clothes resembled the ones of a leprechaun, you know, those ones that take care of a pot full of gold. His height was short too, helping him to give that image. Well, he wasn't that short, but at least he was shorter than Fynx.
The one next to him looked like a human using a wasted bunny fursuit. It resembled that scary and weird rabbit of that D. D***ko movie: A grey, giant hare with messy fur and pale eyes. His weird shape of a standing human didn't help him to appear more approachable, instead, it looked really repulsive.
The last one, was clearly not human now that I was able to look him from this close, he was a giant dormouse. It looked like he was the most tired of them all, almost as he was also tired of being with those other two. Of the three, he was less friendly looking, even less than the weird standing hare.
The three of them noticed us and stopped looking at their empty plates and cups. INstead, they started looking at us. We stood still, waiting for something to happen, but that proved to be a mistake, because the Leprechaun and Hare started talking.
“Look, look! They seem like they have been frozen in place!”
“Did you say frozen?!”
“Yeah, frozen in place!”
“Whkakakaka~!”
“Kiukiukiukiu~!”
“...”
While the Leprechaun and the Hare were talking nonsense, the Dormouse said nothing and limited himself to let out a long sigh. He seems to be tired of all those jokes. On the other hand, the other two looked like they had already fallen into madness.
“Maybe they got cold feet?”
“Did you say cold feet?!”
“Yeah, cold feet!”
“Whkakakaka~!”
“Kiukiukiukiu~!”
“...”
They threw another joke. The Dormouse looked even more irritated than before, he was holding his head with both of his hands, trying to hold himself to that little bit of sanity that he had left. On the other hand, the white rabbit we were following had a really worried expression, it looked like he knew what was going to happen next.
Sadly, as everyone knows, there's no first without second, and there's no second without third. That being said, the Hare and Leprechaun started their routine again.
“Come on, say something! You're being too cold, that's not cool!”
“Did you say cold and cool?!”
“Yeah, cold and cool!”
“...”
“Oh come on, stop this nonsense right now!”
Unexpectedly, the one that stopped their comedy was Phlum instead of the Dormouse. She looked really angry. I can't say I don't understand her, I mean, what are those two supposedly doing? The little Phlum had her fists clenched, almost as if she was ready to fight.
“That's no cool, kid!”
“Not cool at all…”
“...”
“Stop! If you say something more, I swear I’ll kill you!”
But Phlum’s warning did not work. Instead, both of them started joking about it and laughed in an even more scandalous way than before, hitting the table with their hands as they did.
“Did you say stop?!”
“Yeah, she wants us to stop!”
“Whkakakaka~!”
“Kiukiukiukiu~!”
“Whkakakaka~!”
“Kiukiukiukiu~!”
“Whkakakaka~!”
“Kiukiukiukiu~!”
“I’ve warned you!”
Normally I would say that without warning, Phlum jumped to them. But she had actually warned them so this is definitely not a surprise attack.
Phlum jumped towards the pair of weirdos and launched two heavy wind blades right onto their necks. Under normal conditions, they would have been finished right there, but maybe because Phlum was a little girl, or maybe because they were really strong, nothing happened to them.
Instead, the wind blades cut the floor at their backs and then Phlum was launched away, heavily hitting the ground on the fall.
The thing that was even more than terrifying that Phlum being defeated, was the fact that the Hare and Leprechaun did not appear to have move a single inch in order to achieve that goal.
“What the…?! Phlum!”
“...!”
“Finally some action! Fufufu~”
“It seems like they are really strong, Onii chan!”
Even <The Maggot> was on ward after what just happened.
The Leprechaun and Hare looked at their empty plates and cups before standing and starting walking at us. Both of them let out a sigh, as if we were mere bugs interrupting their picnic.
The Dormouse left his chair with a big sigh and reached the Leprechaun and Hare that were coming straight to us.
“Maybe we should kill them?
“Did you say kill?!”
“Yeah, kill them!”
“Whkakakaka~!”
“Kiukiukiukiu~!”
“Come on, give me a break...”