So, I'm a witch, so what?

So, have you all missed me yet? I know I've been missing for a couple of chapters and that the story has kind of slowed down a lot from the chaotic nature of the whole thing I had going on in the past. Still, it has its own implications, and to be honest, it's primarily because of my problematic nature.

Anyway, I better stop breaking the fourth wall and get back on schedule before Rumiko Pal notices. If you don't already remember what happened since the last chapter, I will make you remember with some simplified lines and explanations!

So basically, I've been reincarnated into a fantasy world like the ones you would see in fantasy novels back on earth, and through some very unlucky events and some elbow grease, we've landed in a safe land after our whole race got massacred!

I'm skipping a lot of details since you don't need them all to know what kind of situation I've got myself into now, but I will explain enough so you catch my current dilemma, my big, big problem! So basically, thanks to some events and random facts about my power, I've gained authority over two holy ruler skills or whatever.

The achievement of gaining such holy skills is not that impressive to me, but apparently, it is quite a big deal according to an emboy of the world church, which is comically named "the word of god." Apparently, the holy titles I've gained are super rare or something of the sort, which is why now the church and the nobility of this new land have openly started a political war over me!

I mean, come on, man, why are they all trying to get me on their side like I'm some sort of fighting bull or something!? It's pretty humiliating if anything else at all! I don't even know how to wield these holy powers effectively, and yet these two big-shot factions are fighting tooth and nail to declare ownership over me! What the hell!?

I'm not some sort of merchandise you guys happened to stumble upon, so please stop fighting over me, okay? It's not like I'm having a great time living the luxurious life like a bit of leach in the lord's mansion, okay? I'm clearly not taking advantage of both sides to live like a queen, okay? I swear, okay? Okay? Okay okay? OOOKAY!

In due seriousness, the level to which some of these people will go just to try and gain a little bit more of my trust over the other is quite crazy since I don't even wear the same good old robes I used to when I still lived like a peasant with Bart and Vera.

I'm not joking when I say that both sides have gone to extreme lengths to try and win favor over me for the upcoming international debate. The church has turned around and actually started sending me gifts like sweet pastries and expensive dresses, and of course, at the same time, the nobility of the area matches the church's offerings!

Talk about holding some leverage out of nowhere?! Am I Kazuma Satou, or what? No, I doubt all of this is happening because I've got great luck. If anything, it's probably the opposite. Aw, quit crying about how I shouldn't know anything about Kazuma and other novels! It's a little easter egg, okay? Nothing wrong with that is there?

Things have gotten better since the last time I saw the demon who reincarnated me here, but something about me feels off. While I do remember most things from the recent past, I can't remember much of the conversation I had with that demon when he reincarnated me here. Why was he mad at me again? I don't remember! Oh well, it must not have been that important if I have already forgotten!

What matters now is what I have ahead, which smells like it could be trouble since I have powerful parties fighting over me like I'm some sort of game-changing tool that they want! Seriously, I don't get it! I don't see why I am so special when I don't even know how to use "holy" power.

If what I've heard is correct, then the church shouldn't have a lack of holy power itself since you know it's the damn church and all! And the nobles of this kingdom also don't make sense because, as far as they know, I haven't proved my worth at all. All I've done so far could be considered a scam! I haven't even exorcised a single demon!

Yet both sides continue to fight over me like their life depends on it! "Lady Yoimiya, we've heard you like sweet treats! Here! Take these! Lord Bolto sends them!" And just in time, an important-looking dude breaks into my walking session in the middle of the lord's Garden just to hand me poison!

I love sweets, don't get me wrong, but I've got way too many of them in my room already! I can't possibly ever be done with them, so I've been secretly giving them away to the maids when no one is watching! And what is the whole "lady" thing about!? I'm not even a teenager yet, man! Heck, I'm not even of noble descent, as far as I know!

"Thank you! Send Lord Bolto my highest regards!" I'm finally forced to respond to the messenger, who quickly scrambles out of the area after handing me a large plate of sweets that look awfully tasty! I could really eat some! NOO! I don't want to be like that! But maybe just one!

Ahhh! It's not fair that temptation is calling me, and it says, "Eat me! I'm tasty!" But I know that if I eat too many of these sweets, I will become just like that one lady I saw back then at the market, that little ball-shaped lady! I don't want to be ball-shaped, okay? You already make fun of me, so I don't want to give you any more fuel for roasts!

Where's Vera and Bartholomew, you ask? Well, Bartholomew is back to his previous role in the lord's mansion, so he's back at being a trainer for royal kids and guards; as for Vera! Well, Veronica is currently training to become a royal wizard since she's incredibly powerful.

Jokes aside, I'm kind of not comfortable with this new sudden lifestyle since I've never really been a pleasant person. I'm a fantastic manipulator, but even I get tired of so many people to process at a time that even I get overloaded and just get bricked.

"This machine can't handle any more tasks at once. Please connect an alternative source of power! Beep, boop, beep!" I make a little robotic gesture, which feels weird for some reason. Where did I learn that expression and movement from? I don't remember where that's from. Uhm, that's weird!