Release that Man

A real man not only needs to use the bathroom often but having morning wood is necessary to be considered healthy.

Ye Shuang, after surviving the nightmare that was going to the bathroom, woke up the following morning to discover that life could always be worse…

Having had a difficult time getting to sleep the night before, the Ye family’s two elders woke up quite late the next morning. Little Brother Ye, though, adapted to the situation like a fish to water. He’d slept the moment his head hit the pillow. The next morning, he woke up completely refreshed. He exited his bedroom, and the first thing he saw was a weary-looking handsome man cooking noodles in the kitchen.

Little Brother Ye was still blurry-eyed having just woken up. The first thought that came into his mind from seeing a strange face was Thief! His first reflex was to raise his arm to punch at the intruder. Thankfully, before the punch connected, the handsome man turned around, and the familiar gaze reminded him that this was his new and improved older sister …

“Sis‽” Little Brother Ye patted himself on his face to wake himself up. He exclaimed, “How come you still look like sh*t after a good night’s sleep?”

“…” Ye Shuang really didn’t want to relive her awkward morning and definitely didn’t want to let this little monster in on the devastation she had experienced. “None of your business.”

Ye Shuang’s expression worsened, but Little Brother Ye only got more excited. Ye Feng stood there quietly in contemplation before he quickly settled on the reason for his sister’s darkened expression. He exclaimed excitedly, like he was on a trivia contest, “Sis, did you harden like a Metapod in the morning‽”

With a crack, the wooden chopsticks in Ye Shuang’s hand snapped in two. This was as good a confirmation Little Brother Ye was going to get. He explained happily, “That means you have a healthy body. It’s not something to be angry about; it happens to every man…”

Little Brother Ye was exceptionally elated, probably because of the jealousy between men. As long as a man more handsome than me suffers, I’m glad, even if that person is my own siste r.

“You can just tell me if you want to die.” Ye Shuang dumped the broken chopsticks into the trashcan and glared at her brother as she pulled out another pair of chopsticks and continued cooking the noodles.

It was then that Little Brother Ye woke up from his euphoria. He was reminded of the death of the innocent chopsticks! During the explanation the day before, the Ye family had been too stunned by the ‘uncertainty of sex’ that they had forgotten to pay attention to another feature of the jade sculpture. It could strengthen the recipient’s physical and mental prowess.

However, Little Brother Ye was quickly reminded of the many interesting changes that had happened to his sister after watching Ye Shuang break a pair of chopsticks in two with her bare hands.

It made sense, since he did see the six-pack on Ye Shuang’s body. Those abs definitely weren’t there for show.

When Little Brother Ye returned from his reverie, Ye Shuang had already finished cooking the noodles, and she carried them to the dining room. Little Brother Ye, who had plenty of questions on his mind and a stomach that needed to be fed, rushed out to follow her.

“Sis, sis! Wait, tell me, did you gain any superpowers‽” Little Brother Ye snatched a bowl and started serving himself a bowl of noodles from the pot. As he added the condiments, he asked anxiously, “Like the ability to see through walls? Mind-reading? Stopping time? Or telling the future? Can you please tell me the answers to my upcoming midterms‽”

Ye Shuang was depressed beyond words. “You’ve watched too many television shows. Optimization of the body and the mind is all I’ve got, and that is attached to this sex-changing side effect… If you like it so much, how about a trade‽”

“Sure, why not? If I become a woman, I can openly walk into the female changing room.” Little Brother Ye sucked on the noodles contently. Since the trade was unlikely to happen, he was more than happy to annoy Ye Shuang with his words. “But based on how you put it, this thing is less impressive than I thought. Other people walk away with a system, a superpower, or at the very least, some kind of extra-dimensional space. Looks like a second-rate person is destined to have a second-rate upgrade…”

If not for the fact that the kid was Ye Shuang’s biological brother, she really might have tossed him out the third story window. After the siblings finished their breakfast, Father Ye and Mother Ye finally woke up.

The two had probably prepared themselves in their bedroom, because when they exited their bedroom and saw a handsome man clearing out the dining room while holding his sleeves, their reaction was less excitable than Little Brother Ye’s… Of course, this was still something that they would need to get accustomed to and that would take time.

Mother Ye walked into the kitchen to add more variety to the breakfast while Father Ye walked to the living room and sat down on the sofa. He cleared his throat audibly and signaled for Ye Shuang to sit down across from him.

“Shuang Shuang…” The term of endearment he had always used for his eldest daughter became incredibly awkward when he realized it was directed at the inhumanely handsome man sitting before him. Father Ye choked on his own words before starting again. “I mean, Xiao Shuang…”

Thankfully, the name he had picked was gender-neutral enough for male and female. If he had chosen a name with Rou or Jiao… just the thought of it made Father Ye shiver.

The nickname that had been used for the past 24 years had been changed just like that… Ye Shuang lowered her head to sigh, but there was nothing she could do against the overbearing power of reality. She forced herself to speak. “Dad, what is it that you want to say?”

Father Ye coughed and said, “I just want to ask you, what is your plan for the future?”

“Future?” Ye Shuang thought about it before raising her head, which was as dreamy as a Greek sculpture, and said with conviction, “To return to my female body, I swear to entrap a good man and jump on…”

Father Ye coughed violently to interrupt Ye Shuang. “That’s not what I meant… Of course, that’s important too, but you… Never mind, what I meant was, before you return to your original sex, what do you plan to do about your work and living arrangement?”

Father Ye’s heart was bleeding under his stern demeanor. These questions are so awkward; I should have asked the wife to communicate with her.

Ye Shuang was not privy to the difficulty in her father’s heart. However, when she heard the question, she did start to worry. “I was just thinking about that. This body… other than the bodily functions, the biggest difficulty is my job. If I ask for a day off every three days, I swear I’ll be fired by the end of the month…”

As the pillar of the house, of course Father Ye had thought about these issues before Ye Shuang did. It was why he had called her over to have this conversation so early in the morning. However, truth be told, since this problem was so rare, even with Father Ye’s experience in life, he couldn’t come up with the perfect solution.

“You will definitely have to find a new job,” Father Ye suggested to begin with. “You currently work in an office; it’ll definitely attract attention if you keep disappearing from work, but what can you do if we’re talking about a new job? You’ll have to think about that yourself… Also, the problem of bodily functions, you’ll have to overcome it somehow. There’s no need to feel awkward, after all, it is your own body.”

“I’ll try,” Ye Shuang promised.

As the conversation drew to a close, Mother Ye came out of the kitchen to serve breakfast. Father Ye sighed in relief and stood up to wash his hands. Ye Shuang sat on the sofa and continued to mull over the dramatic changes that had happened to her life.

Human beings had an eye for beauty. The picture of the brooding man caused Mother Ye’s heart to break. Ye Shuang was merely sitting there quietly, but it was as if she was posing for an oil pointing. Mother Ye, whose heart was crying out for her daughter, had lost her appetite for breakfast. She stood up from the dining table and walked over to comfort her precious son .

“Shuang Shuang, don’t be sad, you’ll be back to normal in another three days.” Mother Ye patted Ye Shuang gently on her back. “Later, we’ll go shopping to buy you some new clothes; it’ll be able to take your mind off things.”

“Okay.” Feeling the warmth from her family, Ye Shuang raised her head and forced a smile. She nodded and was about to speak when…

The fatal picture of the man with a melancholy smile struck Mother Ye, and she fainted with a bleeding nose.

Ye Shuang’s face darkened.